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Well, I am in a love place, called Taunton, which is Somerset, west country (Also known as the west country) it a beautiful, rural place, with a bussling town and wonderful architecture. I love the place I am staying in, my uncles home, it light airy and certainly a home, not a house. I am still getting used to not having to ask if I desire doing something. My aunt and uncle think it is odd that I ask, but after a few of my more uptight relatives, it is little wonder that I ask.

I know that during my childhood there were family upheavals that resulted in my not having seen myuncle in a long time, I kept in contact with his children to the point of considering my cousin more of a brother type than a cousin, but having not been in contact with his dad could have left me with some issues. However there has been none. 

The one overall impression I believe I will take away with me is of a pair of people who can notstop laughing and cutting jokes with each other and all who step foot in their home. It has been a relaxed atmosphere, one that for a chunk of my life I think I probably needed, yet due to problems that shall remain un-named I didn't have the chance to experience. On one hand I am greatful for that. When the chips were really down for me, it gave me the opertunity to experience something desperately needed. On the other hand, who knows how more relaxed as a child I could have been, how much more self assured I could have turned out.

These however are questions that will forever remain minus an answer. I am who I am, I experience that which I experience. And right now I am experiencing a really good time, when not thinking of another uncle.

My other uncle is now permanantly a resident in a hospice. Iknew when my father died he was desperately ill, and one person did mention that heexpectedthat without the close brotherly bond of my father and his, that he wouldn't survive. Let's put it thi way, for all the happiness, joy and humour of the past three days, a part of me is sad because I am waiting for THAT phone call. The one telling me he is dead. It's horrible in one way, but at least when he passes he will not be in pain, will suffer no more and all of the infirmities he has currently will no longer plague him. That in some small way will be a small consolation,

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angel_jane

April 2011

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